Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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