I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Randomize
