Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
