I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
