Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
