Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
