i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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