I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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