Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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