I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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