sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
