I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
being pregnant is like rehab
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
