so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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