adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
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Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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