went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
