You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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