i already hear my dad disowning me
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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