Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
