I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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