do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
