I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize