fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Randomize
