we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
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