Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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