If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
