last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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