Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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