Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize