In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize