if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize