I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
