Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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