dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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