And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
