Porn is love you can see.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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