Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
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I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize