I just made out with a guy for $7.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
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I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
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Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
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