Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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