I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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