Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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