lets start a swedish sibling band together
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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