so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
