just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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