hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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