that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
