What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
