you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
