used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
