It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
