That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Still dying that you shit outside
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
