so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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