yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
